Dark day

Another in-house vacation day. It wasn't a good one. I was stressed over how to do my job, and even though I was "independent", I felt I had no control. No matter what I did or where I turned, I felt a "presence". And it bugged the hell outta me.

I love my co-workers. But they seem to depend on me more these days, and I can't support them as well as I used to. Each time I hear my name and am pulled in 15 different directions, I get aggravated. I think I can now honestly say, "I hate my job."

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Today was the congressional hearing on steroid abuse in Major League Baseball. Probably the most disappointing thing is Mark McGwire's continued silence on the issue. I commend him for stating that baseball has a problem, and he certainly wants to help do something about it. But not stating either "yes" or "no" as to whether he has used steriods has placed him under the very cloud he's trying to help remove.

Sammy Sosa and Rafael Palmeiro both denied ever using steroids. Palmeiro did so in convincing fashion. McGwire is sincere in his statements, and he showed great emotion. He's a Boy Scout to Jose Canseco's Bad Boy. Because he's a good guy, I believe he cannot lie. If he's telling the truth, it should be no problem for him to say "no, I have never used steroids". But his lawyers tell him not to say that.

If he has used them, his lawyer, and possibly McGwire too, feels admitting it would destroy him. Unfortunately, his refusal to say anything today may already have done the damage.

I will always like McGwire, regardless of whether he has used steroids or not. I'll take the good guy over the bad guy any day.